Groupon Blog

The Juice is Worth the Squeeze


With Christmas and New Year a distant memory, by mid January I was still staring at a handful of Quality Street, the last chocolatey hurrah from my season of gluttony. The fear of flab suddenly struck me and I vowed to get my butt into gear and get healthy again. The month of new years resolutions, detoxes and flings with the local gym was already well under way and something needed to change. Fast.


I’ve read about juice cleanses being a great way to kick start a healthy lifestyle and with a celeb following from the likes of Blake Liveley, Kim Kardashian, Nicole Richie, Gwyneth Paltrow and Miranda Kerr (to name a few), it was hard not to want to try this health trend out.


I did have some concerns. Coming from a family where food is the main communal activity and topic of conversation, I wondered how my body would react to such a drastic change in eating habits. My mother and father did ‘the cabbage soup diet’ once, my dad lasted 2 days and my mum managed 8 long hours which ended with her experiencing a blinding headache and scoffing a pasty. It didn’t look promising.


1 Juices on the Tube


Juice Cleanse UK provide 3, 5, 7, and god forbid 14 day juice cleanses to those wishing to refresh, renew and rebalance their bodies. Owner Leigh lovingly designs all his juices to be consumed in a specific order, at two hour intervals. To get the best out of my cleanse, I followed Leigh’s 3 day beginners plan to the letter; with the first juice at 10am and the last at 8pm.



Experienced ‘juicemares’ last night, think it is pre-juicing nerves. HOW WILL I MANAGE WITHOUT FOOD.

On the bus. Sure I can smell bacon. Cruel, cruel world.

Kicked the day off with a hot water and a slice of lemon to help with digestion.

First juice and a strange looking bag of things. Maybe they are to soak up excess moisture like the silicon balls you get when you buy a pair of shoes. No. Referring to the website, I have now been informed they are ‘chia seeds’. Spilt most of them on my desk trying to eat them, have decided to put them in juice and down them. ‘Tummy Soother’ smells of cucumber and tastes, er, green. Tummy feels notably un-soothed, possibly because I’m wondering what to have for lunch. Oh. I’ll be having juice. Psychological aspect of this is tough. Daydreaming about a burger. Any burger. Even horse.

Time for ‘The Cooler’. Ugh god, not cucumber again. Hoping for pineapple and coconut but unfortunately, it’s not to be. This one contains pear and is a little sweeter than the last. Not bad.

Eyes hurt and have a headache. Am I detoxing already? God this stuff is insane.

Realised I have forgotten to wear my glasses.

Despise beetroot but drank my juice quickly. Bearable. Someone just mentioned malteasers and I felt a wave of despair crashing over me.

OMG this juice is amazing. ‘The Revitaliser’ is made from pineapple, ginger and coconut. More like a treat than a detox tonic. Perfect for this time of day when i’m feeling totally grumpy and fed up with the idea.

‘Super Food Berry Blend’ is so so delicious. Bitter and fruity, giving my palette a hit like a really strong coffee when you’re lagging in the afternoon. Really hits a spot, although I realised I am subconsciously staring maliciously at anyone with food.

Last juice of the day ‘Slumber Elixir’ is down. I’m feeling positive that I’ve managed to do a whole day without throwing in the towel and having a pasty. If I can get through tomorrow, I’ll be home and dry(ish).


4 The First Juice


Day 2

After falling asleep immediately, I woke up feeling surprisingly OK. Thought I’d be shattered and starving, but I feel fine. Had some creative ideas about work and after my much needed sleep I’m feeling recharged. Annoyed I can’t have a jaffa cake bar as my afternoon snack.

Am in a really good mood. Opened the juice and my colleagues groan *ughhhh* as they catch a whiff. ‘It’s cucumber and kale’ I say proudly. They don’t want to try. I’m surprised at my own attitude, maybe I’m starting to like it.

Clear headed, feeling good. Worried I might crash this afternoon. Not hungry as such, but craving textures and tastes. Malteasers are again at the forefront of my mind, but I feel like eating them would ‘pollute’ my body. What is happening to me.

Drinking my juice while Sarah (colleague) has an Itsu next to me. We are no longer friends.

At almost 3 o’clock on the dot my energy levels have dropped like a stone. This is the time when I need my coffee and chocolate bar. Learning a lot about my eating habits and when my sugar dips are. This is teaching me a lot!

After my pineapply/coconutty drink of lusciousness, I’m considering upping the ante to 5 days of juice. Think I’ve lost the plot.

Beautified myself with bath, face pack and painted nails. Not tired at all and feeling completely energised. Totally different to yesterday!


2 Juices 3 Days


Day 3

Have only gone and asked for 2 more days of punishment juice. Only joking. I feel totally fabulous.

First juice is not the cucumber ‘Cooler’, it is something slightly different. Thank god. Juice is pretty nice, refreshing! Unfortunately, this sacrifice will come at a hefty price later on in the day. Double beetroot!! Ughhhhh!

The good: the revitaliser already! Mmmm I could totally drink this juice all day every day.
The bad: I will probably have a longer sugar dip this afternoon without this sweet little pick me up
The downright ugly: This means 2pm AND 4pm are now beetroot o’clock.

Food smells from lunch are still getting to me but no way near as much as yesterday. Off to see my ‘juice dealer’ at 5pm to pick up my next 2 days worth. #juiceaddict

Manically cleaned the entire flat as I had a ridiculous amount of energy. Nowhere near as tired as I have been on previous days. Finding it slightly harder to sleep today, almost have too much energy. Can’t complain.


3 The Juices


Day 4

Today was the biggest struggle. Whereas over the previous three days I have been able to feel the benefits of a clear head, my body is now feeling the effects. Just got a hot flush and feel suddenly very weak. This went after 5 minutes or so. Nearing the end is both a blessing and a curse as I’m now fantasising about what I’m going to eat after day 5.


Day 5

Whoooooooop! I did it!!! Glad yesterday is out the way, I feel amazing again. Skin is clearer and I feel totally alert. If I’m honest, I’m still fantasising about what i’m going to eat tomorrow, but I will make sure it’s a nice salad.


7 The Final Juice


What I Loved:
• How quickly I felt energised! I thought I’d be really weak and tired surviving on just juice but in fact, the longer it went on, the better I felt.
• The variety in Leigh’s juices makes the cleanse actually quite exciting. I looked forward to my favourite juices, and the huge dose of nutrients and vitamins they would give me.


What I Loathed:
• Beetroot.


What I Lost:
• Over the course of the 5 days, I lost a total of 5lb. Although my goal wasn’t to lose weight, I do think this cleanse would be great for anyone wanting to shed a few pounds in preparation for a change to a healthier lifestyle. It’s basically a head start for your body.


What I Learnt:
• My current portion size is utterly ridiculous. If I can live on just juice for 5 days, without actually being hungry, I definitely don’t need to eat meals fit for a giant every single day.
• Loads about my body, when I have my highs and lows throughout the day, how this is reflected in my mood and how I drink nowhere near as much water as I should.


My stomach feels flatter, my skin looks better and I feel way less sluggish than I did before. I think the reason I felt so great both during and after my cleanse, was the quality of the juices. Better quality, fresh fruit and veg equals less headaches, more vitamins and a happy and healthy body and mind. I will totally do this cleanse again, maybe twice a year to keep my body on track and post holiday season it’s exactly what I needed.


Since my cleanse i’ve been drinking loads more water and have put a lot more thought into what I’m eating. In terms of eliminating ‘bad’ food completely? Our relationship is way too strong to come to an end; we’re soulmates. Now where’s that pasty?


If there’s something you’d like to see tried and tested by your very own Groupon guinea pig, feel free to tweet me your suggestions @HumphriesMillie



  1. selina hatherley
    February 7, 2014 at 2:41 pm

    Haaa love this blog – felt we were doing it with you!

  2. Ghie Berry
    February 18, 2014 at 11:28 am

    Great Blog… Very tempted to do this myself as my body could definitely do with a cleanse and I like the idea of higher energy levels and better skin….. What a a big girl eh.

    Nice blog Millie, thanks.

  3. Millie
    February 25, 2014 at 12:24 pm

    Haha thanks Ghie. You should try it! It’s pretty tough, but definitely worth it. Teaches you a bit of self discipline as well, definitely something I usually lack on the food front…

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